I had considered closing this blog account, but my “pack rat” mentality apparently extends into the virtual world. I haven’t had a blog entry since 2017, and since then, my family has experienced a string of painful losses. My father-in-law, Pete, passed away in 2021. The Wooton family lost two beloved family members to cancer (brain and lung cancers). My Aunt Mary died one day before her 89th birthday. The folks who read this blog are likely aware of those losses and the impact on our family. This week, we lost my dear Aunt Ruth, who was about one month shy of her 98th birthday.

Aunt Ruth was the oldest of 11 kids – yes, 11 kids (my dad was the only boy)! Because Dad’s family was so large, I had an extensive support system that extended beyond my immediate family. The connection of our extended family is not uncommon among those growing up in Eastern Kentucky. After Mom and Dad married, they moved to Warner Robins, Georgia, but a few years after I was born, they returned to Kentucky. Dad wanted to “go home” so “his sisters and mommy could be present” in my life. I never fully understood this logic because things in Warner Robins seemed ideal – both parents had stable jobs, a lovely home, etc… However, if they had stayed in Georgia, I would have missed a lifetime of memories of Aunt Ruth. It’s hard to guess how different my life would have been without living just a few minutes from Aunt Ruth’s home and the time spent together at family dinners, church, or various outings. I can confidently say that she was an overwhelmingly positive presence in my life (as well as so many others). She had so many creative talents and used them to nurture others and make them feel loved.

Aunt Ruth was well-known as a fantastic seamstress, and she lovingly used this gift to bring so much joy to my childhood. One of my all-time favorite Christmas presents was a handmaid doll she had made. It was almost as big as me and was sitting atop a brand-new bicycle one Christmas morning. She also made many costumes for Christmas plays at church and many beautiful dresses. Along with Mom and Grandma, she sewed many dresses for me as a child, each crafted just for me, and watching her put together the patterns and cut the fabric was magical. She was such a natural. Years later, I needed “business casual” outfits for a summer job and thought it would be fun to make dresses. I asked Aunt Ruth if I could use her sewing machine, and of course she said yes. When I arrived at her house, she chuckled and, with that characteristic sparkle in her eye, said, “Well, we are going to be busy!” Regardless of my skill, there was no chance that she wouldn’t have helped me, and her comment reflected her willingness and graciousness to help, which is how Aunt Ruth (and the rest of the Wootons) operated. We did things together as a team. We had so much fun working on those dresses together. We shared stories and gossip, and she supplied many snacks and dinner. She also shared words of wisdom and encouragement. Aunt Ruth had the gift of knowing how to make any task a positive experience.

Aunt Ruth’s giftedness for teaching was central to her character. Every time we visited Aunt Ruth, she would provide me with fun and educational activities. During a visit with her and Uncle Silas, she gave my cousin Robin and me a stack of envelopes and taught us how to address an envelope. I don’t recall how old we were, maybe 1st grade. After finishing the activity, Aunt Ruth smiled and told us we were “ready for the world” because we could properly send mail! She also gave me the confidence to read. I was very nervous in the primary grades and afraid to read aloud in class. Dad was very worried, but Aunt Ruth repeatedly reassured him that I was okay. Unconvinced, Dad thought she needed to asses my reading skills. Aunt Ruth asked me to come over and read with her. I thought oh no, this is the end; she’s going to realize that I am dumb and tell Mom and Dad that I need to repeat that school year. I don’t remember how, but Aunt Ruth got me to read an entire book to her. She declared – “Jerry, Ruth is a smart little girl and is just fine! Stop worrying about her.” What a relief. There have been many, many, many times that I recalled those words, and it’s given me confidence. I can’t overstate the impact that the moment I read that book with her had on my life.

Aunt Ruth cared deeply for family and always made time for others. Aside from Christmas, the last two weeks of October were the best time of year: I could count on two birthday parties (mine and Robin’s) and trick or treating on Halloween. I was too sick to attend Robin’s 7th birthday party, and Aunt Ruth brought cake and party favors from the party. My birthday was a few days later, and she returned to check on me and delivered a birthday present. That was the only present that I received that year, because my illness resulted in a cancelled birthday party (unlucky #7). I will never forget those acts of kindness.

Even after her health began to decline, I could only see the strong lady who had been such an integral part of my life. I would recall seeing her walking down the gravel driveway from Grandma’s to our house with an armful of supplies for my college dorm, tirelessly cooking for a huge family get-together, or quickly removing weeds from the garden with the ease of someone half her age. It seemed impossible that her time on Earth was coming to an end. After speaking with her on the phone last week, I couldn’t bear thoughts of not seeing her again or being embraced with her warm and loving hugs.

At this time of grief, I am comforted by the many wonderful memories of Aunt Ruth and grateful that Mom and Dad returned to Kentucky so that I could experience the joys of growing up with family. Aunt Ruth was multi-talented, but her greatest gift was the love she shared with all she encountered. To have been blessed by being her namesake was a true gift.

“So we are always of good courage. We know that while we are at home in the body, we are away from the Lord, for we walk by faith, not by sight. Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord.” 2 Corinthians 5:6-8.